Sunday Rewind 7.20.08

Our "Journey thru Genesis" has brought us to the story of Jacob & Esau. And it’s not a pretty story. You’d like to think that with Abraham as your grandpa and Isaac as your dad, the boys would turn out to be little angels. Instead, you discover a family in which conflict is the norm.

So the connection between these characters and our lives is pretty easy to make.

Like it or not, conflict in relationships are a fact of life. No one is immune to it. The question is not if conflict will come—but rather what will you do with it when it does come.

Some people view conflict in exclusively negative terms. Often, that’s because their experience with conflict has been largely negative, and they bear the emotional scarring to prove it.

But conflict isn’t always negative. Handled properly, conflict can be a great catalyst for growth…an agent for positive change. Surprising as it may seem, it is possible to please God and be a great testimony if we handle conflicts in a God-honoring manner. How?

Try these tips:

• Check yourself first (Matthew 7:5). Conflict raises many motives: revenge, self-preservation, needing to be right... Unfortunately, those motives will always prevent us from seeing the situation clearly. They are "planks" in our eyes. So take some time to check yourself. If your motive is anything other than reconciliation, you still have work to do.
• Remember what has been done for you (Philippians 2:5-11). When faced with the emotion and confusion of conflict, there’s no better place to look than the cross. All of us are, at best, forgiven sinners. At the cross that we reminded to deal with the sins of others as God has graciously dealt with us. Resolving conflict isn’t about getting even; it’s about finding a chance to forgive.
• Follow Jesus’ advice (Matthew 18:15-17). Do all you can to resolve things privately. Only after you've tried that, should you involve 2 or 3 others. If you still can't find a way to forgive, involve the Christ-body.

Like it or not, conflict in relationships are a fact of life. No one is immune to it. The question is not if conflict will come—but rather what will you do with it when it does come.

Imagine if…

• Instead of choosing sides, Isaac & Rebekah loved both sons for who they were.
• Instead of being impetuous, Esau cherished his birthright.
• Instead of exploiting his brother, Jacob sacrificed a bowl of soup.
• Instead of being quick to judge, we checked ourselves first.
• Instead of being obsessed with winning, we humbled ourselves at the foot of the cross.
• Instead of letting conflict fester, we followed Jesus’ advice.

If we did those things, conflict would strengthen instead of destroy.